If you don’t know what it means to be in a healthy relationship, no advice about how to make a girl your girlfriend will make sense.
A healthy relationship has two components:
- A practical component.
- An emotional component.
On a practical level, a relationship is a kind of contract (a set of rules) of what two people expect from each other. Which behaviors are allowed, and which are not allowed.
On an emotional level, it’s a shared narrative that tells a story about what you mean to each other and how significant your bond is as a couple.
Both of these factors are put together to form a healthy relationship. If one of these components is missing or is unhealthy then you’ll have a relationship that’s likely to end up bad (drama, fights, confusion, unhappiness, etc).
Around 40% of American couples are unhappy with their partner or spouse, and I can guarantee that their unhappiness roots from not having either a clear practical component, an amazing narrative, or both.
For example:
On the emotional side, if one person feels like he/she could do better, it’ll lead to a skewed relationship with a lot of one-sided negativity and apathy where one person is chasing the other, even if there’s a good general contract (practical side) in place.
On the practical side, if the terms are not clearly defined (what’s allowed, and what’s not allowed), it will lead to a lot of confusion, unnecessary fights, and all around misery. Ie. Many of the relationships you see in real life.
To sum it up…
A relationship is an exchange of value. If the exchange is good, even when things get bad, both of you will have a reason to stay in the relationship.
Got it? Cool, let’s move on.
To help you in your quest of forming a healthy and fun relationship with an amazing narrative and on your terms, here are 6 reasons why you shouldn’t ask a girl to be your girlfriend, and what to do instead.
Let’s dive in.