Is He Losing Interest? (9 Worrying Signs He Might Be)

Are you worried he losing interest in you?

Perhaps your relationship was progressing nicely, only to now turn cold.

Maybe you’re wondering what you can do to get things back on track?

If so, read on. This guide reveals the telltale signs that his interest levels have dropped. It’s also packed with advice on what to do. 

However, before we dive into this guide, I need you to make sure you understand these new few sentences carefully. 

It’s rare that men lose interest in sex and relations altogether. If he has lost interest in you, it’s often because he has gained interest in someone else. 

The thing is: it’s pointless accusing him of this without proof. 

That’s why I wanted to tell you about this powerful yet discreet online background checker tool.  

With just a few of your partner’s contact details, this tool can produce a wealth of information about your partner’s recent communications. 

You’ll find out who he’s been in frequent contact with, what apps he’s downloaded and whether he has secret alternate contact details. 

If he has been cheating, this tool should make it immediately obvious. 

Either way, it’s likely you’ll have all the information you need to address the situation with your partner properly. 

The guide below reveals whether you’ll need to do this – and how. 

He Doesn’t Text Or Call You Often.

Contents

Chances are, if he’s
losing interest in your relationship then he’s probably stopped texting or
calling as much as you used to. Always assume that his actions are telling you
what his words are not, and in this instance, what he’s saying is that he
doesn’t care if you talk or not. 

When you live apart from
your boyfriend, texting and calling are the only ways to keep in touch and up
to date with each other’s days. If you’re deeply in love with someone, you’ll
find yourself desperate to share all the highlights of your day as immediately
as possible and you’ll want to hear all about theirs. So, if your boyfriend has
dropped the ball when it comes to keeping in contact, he might be losing
interest. 

His lack of digital communication could come in all sorts of forms too. He might be texting, but if he’s drifting away then it’s likely that his messages are short and blunt. One word answers and dead-end messages are a sure sign that he’s running low on interest and is trying to avoid talking. Similarly, he might not be calling or picking up when you call as much as he used to. He doesn’t care to chat anymore. This is definitely considered to be taking the cowards way out, he’s trying to avoid you and put in as little effort as possible instead of being upfront about his concerns.

Check out this great
video for some tips on what to do when he doesn’t text back!

Do This When He Doesn’t Text Back – Dating Advice

He Doesn’t Make Plans For You Both.

In a happy, healthy
relationship, making plans to spend time together is an essential part and
something you stay excited about until the date arrives. An undeniable sign
that your boyfriend is losing interest in the relationship is that he isn’t
trying to make any plans with you anymore. He isn’t interested in spending time
with you or planning fun things to do together. He might even be making excuses
when you come up with the plans yourself. 

A man who loves you will
always go out of their way to spend time with you, whether it’s an extravagant
date night or just a cozy day at home, regardless of his other responsibilities.
Just as you would love to spend all your time with the man you adore, if he
loved you the way he should, he would put in the same effort no matter the
circumstances.

Typically, if he isn’t trying to spend time with you, it’s because he’s trying to avoid you. He’s putting off having to have that inevitable difficult conversation. If he doesn’t want to see you, he doesn’t want to face the truth. He’s also possibly trying to pretend that you don’t exist anymore – out of sight out of mind, as they say. If he’s not interested in spending time with you, he’s not in love with you.

He Isn’t Attentive.

When you’re together,
does he feel connected? Is he paying enough attention to you or what you’re
doing together? When he’s starting to lose interest, he’s probably also pulling
away and spending less time being in the moment with you. If he’s not
interested in the relationship anymore, he’s unlikely to be interested in doing
things together or spending intimate one on one time with you. 

Does he spend a lot of time on his phone, scrolling mindlessly and texting his buddies without taking any notice of you? If you’re sitting side by side, he might be more fixed on the TV show he’s watching than what you have to say – maybe even shushing you when you try to get his attention. When you finally get his attention, he probably isn’t very chatty and doesn’t laugh at your jokes or make any of your own. He’s probably distant and uninterested in what you have to say. His answers will get shorter and less thoughtful and he’ll probably stop telling you any real stories because he doesn’t care to share with you now. 

If he’s behaving in an uninterested way, keeping things short and removed and never really feeling present – he’s probably not interested in the relationship anymore. Remember, his actions speak louder than his words (if he even says any.)

He Isn’t Affectionate.

There’s nothing sweeter
than cuddling up on the couch with your boyfriend, or holding his hand as you
wander through town. These things are the perfect way to show that you love
each other without saying a word. A boyfriend who loves you and is truly
enjoying being with you is typically always affectionate – unless you found
yourself an odd one. Most of us love to share moments of intimacy, like
wrapping an arm around each other or sharing a small, gentle kiss as you go
about your days. Chances are, if your boyfriend has stopped doing these things,
he’s losing interest. 

Being affectionate is an
obvious act of romance and if you aren’t interested in being romantic with
someone, you don’t do it. It’s as simple as that. If you find yourself sitting
on opposite ends of the couch in the evenings instead of snuggled together
watching your favorite shows, he might be losing interest. If he doesn’t hold
your hand, put his arm around you or hold doors open for you when you’re out
and about in the world, he’s probably lost interest already. 

When a person is drifting out of the relationship, they tend to disappear in terms of physical touch and affection. He’ll likely be feeling guilty about his loss of feelings and will be trying to show less affection as to not lead you on. It’s his way of telling you, without the confrontation, that he isn’t interested in doing that with you anymore.

For some advice on what
to do if you want your boyfriend to be more affectionate, take a look at this
great video!

My Boyfriend is Not Affectionate…What Can I Do?!

You Aren’t A Priority To Him.

At the beginning of your
relationship, you probably would have dropped everything for him and he would
have done the same for you. When we’re freshly and deeply in love with someone
we tend to sacrifice everything just to talk to them, let alone see them and
spend time with them. Think about the cliche of spending entire nights awake on
the phone to the guy you have a crush on – that’s often very real. We sacrifice
time with our friends and family, school and work and even our sleep just to be
in contact with our love at the beginning. They are our top priority and
nothing is more important than getting our fix. 

Naturally, as the
relationship progresses this intensity fades away a little, but if your
commitment has remained just as strong then your desire to keep them as a
priority will still be there. We might stop sacrificing everything for
our partners in a long-term relationship, but we will always make time. In a
strong, healthy relationship, there is no such thing as being “too busy”. There
is always time. One hour is enough, one quick date over lunch or coffee will
do. If your boyfriend was still interested in your relationship, nothing would
keep him away for very long. 

If he’s trying to pull
away to make the eventual breakup less of a shock, he’ll start to come up with
all sorts of bizarre reasons why he can’t see you, or call you, or spend time
with you. He’ll more often be going out with “the guys” than ever before, and
choosing to spend time with them over you every time – a healthy relationship
requires a simple balance of the two. The age-old “I’m washing my hair” excuse
will become more and more real as you see him reject your offers for seemingly
unimportant tasks instead. 

He’s Let Himself Go.

This one can be a little
tricky, it’s not always a sign that he’s not interested in you or your
relationship anymore. It comes down to the circumstances. 

In a happy, healthy relationship, it’s not uncommon to gain a little weight. Lots of great dinner dates and nights in with snacks leads to a few gained pounds, but that’s okay! You do it together after all – some relationships even lead to weight loss if you inspire each other to be healthier. It’s also completely normal to stop trying quite as hard to be drop-dead gorgeous at all times. As our relationships become more comfortable and secure we’re willing to hold back on the make-up and push up bras and accept that not every day requires those jeans that make our butts look incredible. As we feel safer, our boyfriends do too and they’re also allowed to hold off on their extra effort too. We love them as they are. 

Where the difference
comes in, is whether he’s relaxed or just doesn’t care. If he’s lost interest
in you, then he probably isn’t dressing well around you and maybe even not
thinking much about personal hygiene. You’ll notice this is a problem if he
dresses up and looks great when he’s going out with friends, or anywhere
without you. That might suggest that he doesn’t care what you think anymore. We
should all still want our person to be a little excited by us sometimes,
reminding them what they fell for in the first place. If he doesn’t want to
show you his best, but he shows it to everyone else, he’s probably not
interested. 

He’s Picking Fights.

When you’re right on the
verge of breaking up with someone, you’ll probably find yourself feeling
irritated by every little thing they do. The things that you used to let go and
maybe even things that never used to bother you at all will start to make you
twitch. If he’s seemingly more snappy than usual and easily roused, it might be
because he’s losing interest in the relationship and is thinking about calling
it quits. 

Subconsciously, we pick
fights because we’re searching for a way out. If he’s starting fights with you
over the smallest of things and allowing the argument to spiral out of control,
he might be looking for an excuse to end it. By highlighting the problems, he’s
hoping to make a break-up seem less surprising and more understandable. 

He’s also probably
trying to push you away. By giving you reasons to be upset, there’s a chance
you’ll do the hard work for him. If he makes it indisputable that your
relationship is flawed and pushes you to the edge, you’re more likely to break
up with him first, allowing him to play the victim and leaving you to be the
bad guy. 

Take a look at this
video for tips on what to do when you find yourself fighting with your
boyfriend.

7 Things You Must Avoid When Fighting With Your Beloved

He Only Wants To Have Sex.

The truth is, even if he
wants your romantic relationship to be over, he’s probably still attracted to
you. If he’s dragging the final moments out, he’s probably still getting to
sleep with you, and if he didn’t then you’d become suspicious of his behavior.
Having sex could be the perfect evidence to back up his “of course I still want
to be with you” lie. 

Sex can also serve as an
excellent distraction technique, to prevent having to talk about how he’s been
feeling or answer any questions you might have about why he seems to be
drifting away. If he’s losing interest, it wouldn’t be uncommon for him to be
relying on intimacy to fill the quiet moments and avoid confronting the fact
that he doesn’t want to talk anymore. If he’s lost interest he probably doesn’t
have much to say and doesn’t want to talk, so having sex allows him to pretend
he’s still engaged without having to sacrifice his silence. 

He Never Wants To Have Sex.

Guilt can often be to
blame for his sudden lack of interest in sex. If he’s generally been a
respectful man, he might be showing less interest in having sex because he
doesn’t want to lead you on or be intimate with you knowing he’s thinking about
leaving. 

He might also be
experiencing a lack of attraction as a defense mechanism, to convince himself
that he doesn’t want to be with you anymore. This is unlikely to be true, a
person doesn’t often lose their physical attraction to someone else in an
instant. 

Conclusion

If any of these signs
rang true for you, it’s important that you take a chance and tell him about
your concerns. 

You deserve to feel
deeply loved by your boyfriend and you should never feel like he’s uninterested
in you and your relationship. If you start to detect any of the signs I’ve
listed, be brave and communicate your concerns with him. Dropping small hints
and changing his behavior a little is the coward’s approach, he doesn’t deserve
the energy you’ll use up trying to figure him out. Be upfront about how his
actions are making you feel and ask him honestly if he’s happy. Don’t take any
of his excuses or his lies – you deserve better. 

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