Did your husband give you permission to sleep around?
Are you confused why he has done this?
Are you unsure how to react?
If so, read on. This is the ultimate guide to dealing with the situation.
However, before we dive into the meat of this guide, it’s important for you to read the next few sentences.
In many cases, if your husband is giving you a hall pass, it’s likely he’s up to something behind your back.
That’s why I wanted to tell you about this powerful online tracking tool.
With just a few of your husband’s basic details, this tool will create a database of his recent communications.
You’ll discover:
- who he’s been in frequent contact with;
- what online services he’s using;
- what contact details he has registered;
- and a lot more.
Put simply, if your husband is up to dodgy stuff, this tool will make it immediately obvious.
And I’m here to give you the low down and tell you what it really means if your husband has given you a hall pass.
What does having a
hall pass allow you to do?
Contents
Firstly, I think it is
important for us to talk about what hall passes really are. A hall pass is
essentially a get out of jail free card for infidelity. Your husband is telling
you to go for it if you have any sexual urges towards other people. If you do
have sex or any other romantic encounters with anyone else, your husband has no
right to get angry about it.
However, a lot of
people’s hall pass rules are different. So, it’s a good idea to define what
counts as acceptable and what isn’t. Usually, sex is accepted but full-blown
romantic relationships with someone else will be frowned upon.
It’s also important to figure out if you will discuss what you have been doing with others. Some couples find that speaking about their infidelities makes their relationship better, and sexually it spices things up. However, other couples might not want to share what they have been doing because it can make them jealous.
What does it really
mean?
There could be many
explanations for your husband giving you a hall pass, and we are going to have
a look at a few of them. However, the best advice I could give would be to
communicate with him. It will be likely that if he is offering you a hall pass
you will speak about things at length anyway, so during the conversation ask
him what his reasons are.
Of course, he might
not be completely honest with you, so it could mean one of the four things I
have listed below.
1. He is cheating on
you and wants to cover it up by offering you an opportunity to be unfaithful
too.
Even though this is a
horrible reason, it has to be considered. Your husband could be giving you a
hall pass to sleep around because that is exactly what he has been doing,
without you knowing. Guilt might finally be catching you with him, and so he is
offering you the opportunity to go and have sex with someone else.
He might also be
hoping that you will offer him a hall pass too, which would make him feel
better about cheating on you. He will then feel like you’ve almost permitted
him to cheat – even though you haven’t because you were oblivious. You will
probably be able to notice if this is the reason for your man giving you the
idea of a hall pass. He will push you to accept his offer, even if you don’t
want to.
However, if you had no suspicions about him cheating on you before now, don’t let this be your first thought if he offers you a hall pass. If he was cheating on you, you would have probably noticed some changes in his behavior before this point. If you do have your suspicions but you can’t be sure, feel free to go and check out my article, “10 Signs A Man Slept With Another Woman”.
2. He might have heard
that it will benefit your relationship.
There is a lot of talk
about how allowing your partner a hall pass can add new sparks to your
relationship or spice up your sex life if it isn’t good. So, it might be time
to have a think and ask yourself, “Is my relationship not doing great at the
moment?”. If you realize that your relationship is having difficulties or in
particular your sex life is non-existent, then your husband could just be
recommending this to try and fix what’s going on.
Even if hall passes aren’t the best way to fix a failing or monotonous relationship, you have to commend him for trying. Amazingly, he has taken the initiative to find ways to fix or improve your relationship. This is a sign that he definitely still loves you and is trying to work at making your relationship better, no matter what it takes.
3. He might feel bad
if you have not slept with as many people as he has.
If you haven’t had sex
with as many people as your husband has, he might feel bad for tying you down
just to him. He might be offering you a chance to go and explore your sexuality
some more. This could definitely be the case if he is the only person you have
ever slept with, but he has slept with many. He might not want to feel like he
is limiting you.
Also, have you been
hinting that you want to experiment with different people or have a sexual
attraction to someone else? Maybe you have told or hinted to him that you feel
sexually inexperienced? He may have clocked on to that and now wants to allow
you to explore more of your sexuality. When you think about, this is actually
sweet of him to offer. He just wants you to be happy with your sexual
experiences in life.
4. Your sex life might
have come to a halt because of him.
This is the most
selfless reason for him to give you a hall pass. It could be that your sex life
has taken a big hit due to something to do with him. It could be that you have
lost your sexual attraction towards him for the time being or he could be
suffering from sexual dysfunction and is unable to please you. A more serious
reason could be that he has some kind of illness and therefore cannot perform
intimately with you right now.
Your husband is giving
you a hall pass to make sure that you are still receiving pleasure, even if it
is not because of him.
However, if this is
the reason then you would have probably already know this. For instance, he
would have realized that he isn’t providing what you need, explained this to
you and then suggested that you have a hall pass. This is really admirable of
him because he is putting your needs before himself.
What will the outcome
be like if you choose to use hall passes in a marriage?
The answer to this
question really lies with your relationship. Hall passes work for some, and not
for others. It also depends if both people have hall passes or it’s just one.
If only one spouse is allowed a hall pass, it can feel unfair.
Although it might be a
great idea if your sex life needs spicing up and you have exhausted all other
means of doing this, there are many risks involved. It’s important to have a
look at some of the risks detailed below before you say yes to having sex with
other people.
The risks that can
come with using a hall pass in your marriage.
Jealousy.
This is probably the
biggest risk. If you are in a marriage, you are (hopefully) absolutely
committed to your spouse and the idea of them being with someone else does not
excite you, it makes you feel upset and jealous.
If you know that you
would be jealous and angry if your partner slept with someone else, then a hall
pass isn’t what your relationship needs.
You might start to have feelings for someone else.
Even though a hall
pass normally just allows sex, it can be dangerous. Sex is a very intimate act,
and you might find that you start to feel deeper things for someone. Hall
passes can break up relationships because of this.
Over time, the relationship may fall apart.
Sometimes people only
use hall passes once, or twice. However, if you are planning on having a
never-ending hall pass, you might start spending less time with your partner
and more time focusing on having sex with other people.
Conclusion
I really hope that
this article will help you if you are trying to decide why your husband has
given you a hall pass and if you should take it and use it, or not.
All decisions
concerning this topic should be discussed at length by both of you, and one
person can not just decide that they will give themselves a hall pass – this is
cheating.
I wish you the best of
luck in your marriage, with or without a hall pass.
Did this article help
you at all? If it did and you liked what you read, please let us know in the
comments. We would love to hear from you.
Source link: hernorm.com