We’ve all suffered from bad breakups where we feel that we will never be in a position to move on with our lives and get over our ex. However, over time, we do all move on – however slowly. For that reason, there comes a point where we may question whether we are ready for a new relationship or not.
Here in this article, we list signs that will make you realize whether you are ready or not to move to someone new and whether it is possible for you to love someone other than your ex.
How Do I Know If I’m Ready For A Relationship?
Contents
Here, is our definitive list of signs that indicate that it is time for you to get back out there and look for a new relationship.
1. You Don’t Think About Your Ex Very Much
Perhaps the biggest indication that you are at a place in your life to start up with someone new is the fact that you don’t spend much, or any, of your time thinking of your ex. Sadly, many people try to start up a new relationship when they are not fully over their ex. If you are still thinking about your ex a lot of the time, the reality is, that you are not over them or your relationship yet. If you no longer are thinking of that person very much at all, it could be that you are ready to start life without them and move on to someone new.
2. You Are Happy
So often after a breakup, we are exceptionally sad, lost, and depressed. However, a good sign that you are over an ex and are ready to move on to someone else, is if you are happy and content. You’ll know this if you are honest with yourself and ask yourself frankly whether your life has moved on since your last partner. If you have managed to find happiness, then you may feel like you are capable of dating someone or even that you could love someone again. Either way, if you are happy this is a great step forward and it means that you are far more capable of leading a fulfilled life from that point forward.
3. You Are Thinking About Sex With Other Men
At some point after a breakup, we all start to get a little antsy. The reason being is that our source of constant sex has dried up and so our thoughts may drift to having intercourse. A sign that shows that you are ready for a new relationship with someone who is not your ex, is if, when you think about sex, you are not imagining having sex with your ex. Instead, you are thinking about having sex with other people instead. This is a healthy signal that you have moved on from your past romantic life and are at a time that you could really make a go of it with another person.
4. You Find Other People Attractive
Things won’t move on in your life after a breakup if you force the issue. One way to know whether you are really ready for another romantic connection is if you looking around at others and finding them attractive. If this is the case, it means that you are preparing yourself to like another person and be with someone else. Finding other people attractive is a key reflexive way to determine whether your brain and body are ready to make a go of it with another partner. Attraction cannot be forced and if you feel the pull of it towards a person who is not your ex, then it could be that you are ready for a new relationship.
5. You Don’t Care That Your Ex Is In A New Relationship
If you’re not over a breakup, and you also see your ex with someone else, the chances are that that will really hurt your feelings. However, if you are over all of the things that transpired between you and your ex, and you are ready for a relationship, then seeing your ex with someone else won’t hurt at all. In fact, you simply won’t care. This is great as it means that all the hurt and pain you went through that brought about the breakup has subsided and it means you are emotionally ready to move on.
6. You No Longer Feel Acute Pain About Your Last Breakup
If we are not ready to move on and start a new relationship, one of the main reasons will be that all the hurt we felt at the end of our last relationship is still ever-present. It is simply not possible to start up with someone if you still feel acute pain when you think about your ex and your breakup. Instead of starting a new relationship, therefore, it would be better to do some work on your pain and ways to move on from it in the most proactive and healthy way possible. That way you will also put yourself in a good place to start with someone else.
7. You Have A Crush On Someone Else
One step that is huge to take when you are not sure if you are ready for a relationship or not, is whether you have a crush on someone and if you get excited to see that one person each and every time you see them. A crush is not something we can ever control, however much we want to, which is why it is a good indication that you are ready for a relationship. It’s because there is someone in the world that you have a connection with and some chemistry. Whether it is reciprocated or not is another matter, but the fact is that if you have a crush on a person, you are ready to be romantically linked with that person as well.
8. You Want To Date
Often, when we finish a relationship with a person with whom we are in love, it can stop us from wanting to date anyone else for a very long time. However, a good signal that you are over that love, and are in fact ready to love another person, is if you actively find yourself wanting to date other people. It may even feel like a need that you have to have met. This is perfectly natural and should be encouraged. Dating is a great way to get over a past relationship once and for all and can even find you your next love.
9. You Don’t Want To Be Single Anymore
While many people around the world do not like to be single, often after we have broken up with someone, there is a period of time where we also feel like we just need to be on our own. Being in love and being in a relationship can be such an all-consuming affair that when that is ended we need time to be single so that we can breathe. A good sign that you have moved on from that stage, therefore, is if you no longer want to be single.
10. You Have Healed Emotionally
Often what is stopping us from starting new relationships with others is if we are not emotionally ready. This is common because of a breakup that has hurt us tremendously. The result can be that you are too scared to let yourself commit to another person, or it could be that you no longer think it possible to love anyone else. However, after a while, those feelings can start to diminish. You will find that you are emotionally healing and because of it, you are no longer as hesitant to open yourself up to another person or another relationship.
11. You Want Commitment
Of course, it could be that you are not getting over a bad breakup, it could just be that you are ready for a relationship because, for the first time in your life, you are ready to be in love and to make things work with a person through a lasting commitment. At some stage, a lot of people stop wanting to be able to flit from one date to another, or one superficial relationship to another. Instead, they want to be with one person and that someone is someone that they love and need in their life.
12. You Are Jealous Of Others Dating
If you are over an ex and ready for a relationship, you may find that you are really jealous of your friends who are out in the dating world. Jealousy is often a signal that we want something that someone else has. Therefore, if you are jealous that your friends or acquaintances have an active dating life, you can take it that you are ready to start dating and start a new relationship with someone that you meet as a consequence.
13. You’ve Been Single For A Long Time
If you’ve been single for a long time, you could actually be ready to find love and a relationship with another partner, without even realizing it. The reason being is that sometimes we fall into habits without even realizing and start living our lives in a certain way that we don’t question. Being single is a habit that many people get themselves into and they do not know how to get themselves out of it. Additionally, they sometimes don’t question whether they want to be single any longer or not. As a result, if you are not sure whether you are ready for a long term or even short term relationship or not, and you have been single for a long time, the answer could well be yes.
14. You Want Kids
Depending on your age and where you are in your life in terms of wants and needs, you may want to be in a relationship because you want kids. This is a huge decision to take and only one that should be taken if you have considered the implications of having kids from every angle. However, if you still want kids, and you feel happy and content in yourself – it could mean that you are also ready to be in a long term relationship with someone. Children are hard work, no matter how much you love them, so having a partner to share that hard work with can be life-changing.
15. You No Longer Find Flings Satisfying
An important indicator that implies that you may be ready to be in a relationship is if you are already dating, but moving from guy to guy or moving from girl to girl no longer satisfies you. Dating can be fun and a brilliant way of getting out there to experience all types of people. This can be eye-opening and help you learn who you are and what you want from a life partner. For a while too, either when you are young or after a serious breakup, dating and flings can be a great way to have a good time. However, after a while, you may find that they no longer fulfill your needs romantically, and that is when you may find that you are ready to find the one.
16. You Don’t Need A Partner To Feel Complete
Oddly, when a person is ready to be in a relationship, it’s when they are happy to be on their own and feel complete when they are by themselves. So many people come to relationships from the wrong perspective, thinking that they will only find lifelong fulfillment once they have a wife, husband, or long term partner. In fact, the people who have the healthiest and happiest relationships are ones that transpired when the pair were at their happiest on their own. The reason being is that they are not looking for validation from a relationship and as a consequence are not desperate to make any and every relationship work.
17. You’re Confident In Your Own Self
In addition to not needing a partner to feel complete, if you are ready to find love, you will already be confident in your own self and your abilities. This is crucial as without it when you find a prospective partner, you run the risk of losing yourself if you start up a serious relationship with them if you are not confident in yourself. This will result in an unhappy and unbalanced relationship that is not healthy in the long term.
18. You Act Differently With A Particular Person
If you’re already dating, you may find that you are ready to be committed to one person if you act differently around them in comparison to all the other people that you date. You may also feel differently around them. If this is because they make you feel good about yourself or just feel at ease, it could be that you are ready to fall in love with them.
19. You Seem Happy To Go With The Flow
Some people, when they are desperate to be in a life-long relationship, try to force the issue and convince themselves that they are in love with anyone they are dating. However, if you are just happy to go with the flow and see where a number of dates go with someone you are seeing, it could be that you are ready to be in a relationship with them. Going with the flow is a sign of confidence that you both have similar feelings for each other.
20. You Are Happy To Compromise
If you are with someone that you feel you could love or like and are ready to be in a serious life long relationship with, a key signal is that you are more than happy to compromise with them to make them content. This is emotionally mature and also a sign that you want an adult relationship where you both work to support each other and your needs.
FAQs
You need to have an internal conversation with yourself about whether you’re ready or not to start up with someone new. Only then will you be able to answer whether you’re really over an ex. If you realize you need more time, you’ll know you need to work on a few things first.
You need to allow yourself the time and the space to get over the hurt you have felt in the past so you can start things afresh with someone else in the future. Ensure that you deal with any emotional baggage that can make things difficult for you and a new partner.
If you are ready for commitment, you need to be sure that you are willing to make the sacrifices and compromises that all healthy and successful relationships need. If you are emotionally mature enough for a relationship, those sacrifices or compromises will be easier to make.
To the person hearing that you aren’t ready for a relationship, it can seem like an excuse and a bad one at that. However, it is a valid reason if you are telling the truth. If you aren’t ready to be in a relationship, you could cause a new partner a lot of hurt if you have not truly moved on from an ex.
Giving up on a relationship is a tough thing to do as we often have a lot of love or respect for the people that we date. However, if you feel like you have not properly got over an ex from the past, it could be time to end things with your new partner.
The Bottom Line
So do any of these signs sound familiar to you? If that is the case, it could well be that you are ready to be in a relationship. You may have found that person already or it may be that you are ready to start dating so that you find that significant other. Either way, remember to have fun in the process and remember that being in a relationship should bring happiness and contentment the majority of the time.
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