Who Is My Husband Texting? (How to See Who He Is Texting)

Are you desperate to find out who your husband is texting? 

Maybe you’re anxious about him sending messages to other women? 

And perhaps these fears are harming your marriage? 

If so, you’re in the right place. This guide is packed with options to help you stop feeling like this. 

However, before we explore all your options, I think it’s important to cut to the chase. 

If you are worried about who your husband is texting, there’s only one way to truly end these fears. 

And that is to find out who he’s texting. 

That’s why I wanted to tell you about this powerful and discreet background checking tool.

With just a few of your husband’s basic details, this tool can generate a huge database of information regarding his recent communications. 

You’ll discover who he’s been frequently messaging, what online services he has been using, what contact details he has registered to his name…and more. 

There’s no way for him to find out he’s been tracked, so there’s little danger to your marriage.

Hopefully, by using this tool, you’ll see for yourself that he’s completely innocent and it’ll strengthen your confidence in him! 

It’s perhaps an extreme measure, but it’ll give you the immediate truth about what’s going on. And, as they say, the truth will set you free. No more fears, no more anxiety.   

If this doesn’t sound like the solution for you, we’ve detailed some alternatives below.

1. He is protective of
his phone.

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Previously, your
husband might have been really relaxed with his phone and didn’t mind it lying
about or being face up when he knew you were around. All of a sudden, if he is
strangely protective of his phone then this is a red flag. Maybe he always
keeps his phone in his hand or pocket, or if it is out, he always faces it
down. He’s doing this to make sure you don’t see any messages or calls that
come through.

2. He takes his calls
away from you.

Sometimes we all need
to take some space from other people and speak on our phones, this is
understandable if we need privacy to talk about something. However, normally
then you would apologize for having to walk away and explain why you needed to
be private.

If you notice that
your husband is always taking his phone calls away from you, it’s probably
because he doesn’t want you to hear what he is saying. Another sign related to
this would be if his phone rings and he can’t move to a private space, he will
decline the call. He firstly doesn’t want you to see that someone else is
calling him, but he also can’t take the call in front of you because it’ll blow
his cover.

My Boyfriend or Husband Is Always On His Phone When We Are Together (What Does It Mean)

3. He smiles at his
phone.

We all smile at our
phones when we like the person that has text us or they have said something
nice. Do you remember at the start of your relationship when your face might
have lit up after receiving a text or call from your man? It can be a big
concern if you see him smiling at his phone or coming back to you with a big
grin on his face after having a phone call.

4. They hide to use
their phone.

This might be hard to catch of course, because they are hiding from you. However, do you notice that they spend a lot of time locked in the bathroom with their phone or they go to the other end of the house in order to send a text? He is hiding from you to text her. 

If you are in front of
him, he might do this subtly by turning his phone screen away from you so that
you can’t see what’s on it.

5. He goes on edge if
you ask to use his phone for something.

 Most couples
keep their phones pretty private but if they need to use each other’s phones,
then they will be happy to do so because they don’t have anything to hide. If
your husband and you used to be like this, but it’s all suddenly changed this
could be a cause for concern. For example, if you ask to use your husband’s
phone because yours is dead or you need to search the internet for something
quickly and he responds negatively, it could be because he doesn’t want you to
see something on there. He might make up excuses as to why you can’t use his
phone, or he might offer to look for you, so you don’t have to use his phone.

A few behavioral signs
that he is cheating on you or getting to know another woman include:

  • You aren’t having sex anymore, or not as much as you were before.
  • He spends more time away from you.
  • He comes home smelling like a woman’s scent.
  • He never shares any details of his life with you anymore.
  • He is always telling you white lies, which then lead to bigger ones.

Do these signs
resonate with your husband’s behavior?

After looking at the
signs above, you will have hopefully conclude if your husband is speaking to
another woman or not. If you are not sure, you can always monitor his behavior
for a while and then come back to this article, now you know the signs you
should be looking out for. 

However, if you have come to the conclusion that he is being shady and using his phone to probably text someone else, the next thing you will want to do is see who he’s texting and what he is saying. 

How can you see who
your husband is texting?

There are many ways
that you can find out who your husband is texting, however, it depends on how
you want to go about it. Do you think you will get more answers from sneaking
around and spying on your husband’s phone? Or do you think that if you simply
speak to your husband, he will be honest and come clean with you? I would
always suggest using the latter, but I also understand that sometimes it’s not
easy to communicate with someone you suspect is cheating on you, nevermind get
truthful answers from them. Therefore, we are going to take a look at a few
methods that you can use to figure out who it is that your husband is texting,
right from simple questions all the way to using spying software on his
technology. 

1. Ask him.

This is the easiest
approach of course, but it might not deliver honest results. If you think that
your husband would be happy to cheat on you, then he would probably be happy to
lie to your face too. However, I want to put this option first because it is
the best one. In a healthy relationship, you should always be able to speak to
each other, especially when things go wrong or you’re going through a difficult
patch.

The important thing
about this is that you are not confronting him though, you are simply asking
him some questions. You don’t have any evidence to properly confront him, but
the answers to some simple questions might give you the evidence you need, or a
lead on where he is going, what he is doing and most importantly who it is that
he’s always talking to.

When you ask him any
of the questions mentioned below, you mustn’t show any negative emotions,
because you can’t let him clock on to the fact that you suspect he is cheating
on you or speaking to someone else. Keep your voice calm, emotions in check and
never use an accusing tone. You can say something like:

–   “You’re on your phone so much,  do you need help with some life organization?  You seem so busy.” 

This kind of thing is
great to say because he will just think that you are looking out for him and
wanting to help him with his admin because he seems so busy. There’s no hint of
prying, you are simply trying to be a helpful wife. He will also think that he
has fooled you…little does he know.

–      
  “Wow it’s late for them to someone to contact you now. If it’s
work then you should be the employee of the month!”

Saying something
similar to this will probably make him fumble his words. You have subtly asked
who is texting him, and he won’t what to say. If he agrees with you and says,
“Yes, it’s work”. This gives you the cue to ask further…

–      
  “What do you have to do now?”

He might not know how to respond if he is texting another woman and could not only stutter, but he could actually give the game away by slipping up with his words in a state of pressure. 

Unfortunately, your
husband might be a little bit better at hiding the truth from you and harder to
crack. Therefore, you might have to start your detective work to figure out who
he is texting.

2.    Go
on his phone when he isn’t around

This can be really
difficult if your husband is extremely protective of his phone, but if there is
any point when your husband is away from his phone – go on it. I know that this
definitely crosses the personal privacy boundaries, but I understand that if
you think your husband is speaking to another woman you will do anything to
find proof of it. 

Once you have got into
his phone, you need to go straight to his text messages. Have a look for any
names that you don’t recognize, but do bear in mind that a lot of the time,
cheaters will change the name of the person they are texting, just in case you
did ever get on their phone or a call came through that you saw. Because of
this, it’s probably best for you to take a look at all the recent people he has
been texting and see the nature of the conversation. If you find the number you
are looking for, copy the number on to your phone or write it down. Then, you
can start researching the number afterward and figure out who it is. You could
also call the number and see who picks up. You must remember to do this on a
payphone, to ensure that the person doesn’t then have your number.

However, your husband
might not risk texting her, just in case. So, you need to make sure that whilst
you are on his phone you check his social media inboxes and also his emails. If
he is contacting her over social media or email, then it will be easier because
her name will be right there and there is no need for any further
investigation. 

You need to make sure
that you are not caught by him whilst you are using his phone, otherwise, you
might not be able to gather all the information you need, and it could cause a
big argument between the two of you, especially if he is genuinely not cheating
on you.

3. Look at the phone
bill.

If you can’t get
access to your husband’s phone, you might be able to get access to his phone
bill and you can still figure out who he is speaking to through that.
Typically, spouses share the bills, and therefore your cell phone bill and his
are probably together. You could ask for a record of all the numbers that your
husband has been making calls and texts too, or just have a look at the phone
bill yourself. Normally, the people he knows and texts will be the people that
you know. 

Print off a paper copy
of the phone bill or records, take a pen and paper, your phone and sit down.
You will need to have the patience for this, so rush into it. You are going to
need to cross-check all the numbers on your partner’s phone bill with the
numbers you have. If you find out that he is frequently making calls or sending
texts to a specific number that you can’t find on your phone, this could be the
other woman he is talking to. You can then research the number on the internet
and it might bring up the woman’s details, especially if she has it linked to
social media or her work. 

If you search the
number but still can’t find anything, it’s time to locate a payphone and call
the number. If you call and a woman picks up, you can simply ask her name. If
she wonders who is calling, you can tell her you got the wrong number. You
probably have your woman, but to be sure, you will want to take a look at her
social media. If your husband follows her, is friends with her or likes her
posts then you can probably be sure that this is the other woman he is speaking
to.

4. Use software to spy
on your husband’s phone.

Before you decide to
download a spying software, I would recommend trying to figure out who he is
texting by using all of the other tactics. Spying software is firstly not
always reliable, it can be expensive, and it is a massive invasion of privacy.
If your husband isn’t cheating on you and finds out that you have been spying
on his calls and texts, this is far more damaging than you just picking up his
phone and taking a look.

If this is the last
option for you, you can purchase and download software that will allow you to
spy on your husband’s phone. It will let you see what texts and calls are
incoming and might even show you access to what he has on his phone, as well as
sites he has been on. It’s an easy way to catch your husband if he is cheating,
but to be compelled to use this method, you need to be confident that he is,
otherwise it could ruin your relationship because you have violated the trust
between you.

How should you
confront your husband once you have found proof?

Once you have found
proof that your husband is speaking to someone else, and figured out who it is,
it’s time to confront him.

Don’t go on the
attack.

As hard as it might be
for you to try and control your emotions, you need to. If you don’t, your
husband will not be able to open up and be honest with you. He might not
anyway, but it’s worth allowing him to be truthful about what he has been
doing. 

Tell him how you feel.

Your husband needs to
know how you feel. He has betrayed the trust between you. If you get angry, he
probably won’t react the way you want. If you show him how what he has done has
affected you, he will understand the severity of what he’s done.

Take some time out if
you need to.

You haven’t done
anything wrong, so you have the right to take some time away from your husband,
and he can’t stop you from doing that. Taking some time for yourself might help
you to decide how you want to move forward and allows your husband to realize
what life is without you by his side for a while.

Conclusion

However, you decide to
move forward after figuring out that your husband was talking to another woman
is completely up to you. Some relationships do survive through this kind of
situation, and for others, it forces a failing marriage to end. You deserve
someone that loves and cherishes you and you only, and I really hope that
whatever you decide to do, you know this.

Did this article help
you at all? If it did and you liked what you read, please let us know in the
comments. We would love to hear from you.

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